31 October 2007
Last year on this date, I couldn't help but note the number of trick or treaters we had that were past their prime. From what has appeared on my doorstep tonight, it appears last year's suggestions have been ignored. Therefore I am again creating a list of when you should know that you are in violation of the socially accepted age for trick or treating. Call my cynical, but there is an age when you are TOO OLD.
If you are old enough to use the word multi-tasking while having a conversation with me, you're too old. If you are dressed as a St. Pauli beer girl, your too old. If you are really pregnant and it's not part of your costume, you're too old. If you are old enough to be sporting a five o'clock shadow, you're too old. If you are discussing quadratic equations with your buddy, you're too old. If you leave your car running to come to the door, you're too old. If you are too busy fighting with your boyfriend on your cell phone to open your candy bag and instead thrust out your professionally manicured hand, you're too old. If you purchased and consumed a beer before going out, you're too old. If you can vote in the primaries, you're too old.